Someone in our small group brought to my attention they felt like prayer deserved more time and attention. They expressed that they are so many things to be praying about and then they reinforced how important prayer is to our community, our church, and in our personal lives.

I’m sitting here nodding in agreement, but really don’t know what to do with that. So I look around the room and ask what everyone thinks we should do about that. Then someone brings up the idea of a ‘dedicated prayer time’. That sounds good, but that’s what do now. We have a social time, and then we share announcements, and then we pray before jumping into the material. 

No, that’s not what they mean. They want a whole small group scheduled just for prayer! 

I’m thinking,… what!? I still don’t understand. Maybe it’s my lack of faith, or maybe it’s my leadership alarms going off that someone is trying to take the small group in a direction that it shouldn’t go. I’m thinking, ‘I know prayer is important, but this isn’t a prayer group, it’s a small group’. We were careful to outline our purpose when we started, and this was not a part of it. I reminded myself that this isn’t ‘my’ group. I’m a servant here. I’m trying to serve these small group members so that we can grow in fellowship and apply God’s word to our life. So will this help or impede that? Well, it won’t impede it. It could very well help it. I handed  the decision over to the small group and asked, “So who thinks it’s a good idea to have a scheduled small group dedicated to prayer?” The majority, a matter of fact I think it was everyone, said YES! I still remember feeling shocked. 

With that decision, we looked at the calendar and made the decision that every month that had a fifth week that fell on our scheduled small group evening would be dedicated prayer time. I was left with an empty feeling wondering thoughts like:

• Do I have to plan an agenda for this?
• How will I lead something like this?
• Will it only be a five-minute long small group, or will we pray for the whole hour and a half?
• Can people eat and drink while we pray?

Summary

In this article, I will outline how we planned a dedicated prayer time for our small and share some of the lessons learned so that if you decide to host your time this way you can learn from some of the things we did. 

Dedicate Someone to Get Prayer Requests

Something that was a hidden blessing, was that someone volunteered to collect prayer request from church leadership. They did this on a monthly basis and kept track of everything that was on leaderships mind that needed prayer. 

Turned out there was a lot more going at church than any of us realized. From people’s marriages to leadership under attack, to someone being sick, to others needing money. Through this, our eyes were opened to the spiritual battles that leadership was constantly under. Not only that, but it equipped to help. We were now knowledgeable about what was going on and ready to pray about. This really meant a lot to our leaders and pastors. The first time we asked, I don’t think they thought much of it. But time after time they really started feeling our dedicated we were to their requests. As time went on, and they felt more support, our prayer requests from them grew. 

They also shared how much they appreciated our prayers. Not only did they believe in the power of prayer, but the supported it. It blessed our leaders to see that people they shepherd overtake it seriously too. It was encouraging to them to see people in the church praying and not just showing up to check the box on a Sunday morning. They also felt loved. Often times pastors and leaders love others full time. It’s seldom that people love on them by asking them questions about life, give them gifts or notes, and prayer for them. This act of prayer was seen as loving on them and giving something back. 

Be sure to keep a servant mindset when asking and receiving prayer requests from pastors and leaders. Often times there is some sensitivity to the topic. Just take the prayer request the way they offer it. Don’t let the temptation of knowing everything gets in the way and start asking more questions to fulfill our human desire of curiosity. When we start to ask the who, why, what, where and how’s, it should be an alert for our heart to serve what they asked for and not gain what we’re looking for. 

Nominate or ask for a volunteer to go the church leaders and explain that your small group has decided to spend dedicated time in prayer and you’d like their influence of what they want prayer for. 

Build Reference Cards

A really great way to enable people to pray is equipping them with a list of ideas to pray for. Often times, when people to show to pray they have anxiety about praying in front of others. Because of this, their mind is not focused on prayer and what to pray for. Equipping them with a list of ideas help get them back on track and prevents them from feeling like they need to think of something to pray for quick. 

The best way to create reference cards is to grab a bunch of 4 x6 or 5 x 7 notecards and write out with a Sharpie bulleted points. The bigger cards work a little better, as some people forget their glasses and might have a hard time seeing the smaller print. 

Consider your church and all the ministries that exist. Here’s a list of things we came up with that you’re welcome to use and add to your notecards:

• Small Group
• Youth Ministry
• Music Ministry
• Children’s Ministry
• Marriage Ministry
• Food and Serving Ministry
• Childcare Ministry

Once you’re done listing out all the ministries you can think of, move on and now write down all the roles that people are serving in at your church. Here are the roles we came up with:

• Church Leadership & Staff
• Facilities Management
• Ushers
• Sound, Lights & Screen Control
• Pastors
• Youth Pastors
• Elders 
• Deacons

Now start moving outside the church and pray for visitors, community, neighbors that can be impacted by the power and purpose of Jesus moving through the church. 

• Lost
• Church visitors and guests
• Neighborhood
• God’s word would go out
• People would witness and share testimonies

We created a downloadable prayer reference card for you to use. Just click the download button below.

Pick an Intimate Location

Prayer times are complemented by being comfortable and peaceful. A question I often like to ask others is, “Where do you have your best quiet times reading the Bible and praying?” I love the diverse answers I get back. It’s really opened up my mind to get off the coach and try another place. My point is the environment we pray can impact how at peace we are, and in turn, help us pray more thoughtfully and longer. 

Pick someplace warm. One guy told me his favorite place to pray was his ice house! With a propane heater, even that can place can warm up. A nice thing to do for small group members is to have blankets available. One of our small group members asked if I could host our prayer time in my office because I have a wood stove in there. They all love the look of the rolling fire behind the glass, the northern woods smell, and the radiance of the thick steel emanating heat. 

Lighting can have an influence on how comfortable the setting is too. Try to find a place with some nice mood lighting, not too bright. Maybe even consider lighting some candles to really spruce up the ambiance. 

Try to keep artificial smells to a minimum, or none at all. This can really irritate some peoples senses and distract them. Best way to find out is just to ask people ahead of time. I live a nice soft vanilla smell, but air filled with potpourri starts to give me a headache. Check and see what your small group likes and doesn’t. 

Consider the size of the room. Pick a place where everyone can squeeze in. Trying to avoid rooms that are really big, and once everyone finds a spot you can even hear each other praying. People tend to take up the room given. A small space makes it cozy and friendly. It makes it easy to hear one another and helps create that intimate setting that supports prayer. 

Have a Social Time

Just like a regular small group, have an informal social time. This is the time people can grab a coffee and snack and relax and catch up. Having this time to just chill out together will really help people ease into the prayer time. As I said before, some people are new to this (I was), and when it got started I felt anxious. I assume other people are going to feel this way too. 

Sharing conversation over a cup of coffee really helps break the tension and calm nerves. 

Set Expectations & Instructions

Some people haven’t done group prayer before.  Give everyone an idea of what this time will look like. Thank them for coming. Take a minute to cover things small group members may have not heard of before like what popcorn prayer is.

Pass out the prayer reference cards you created and explain what they are and how to use them. Highlight a few items and explained how they are arranged. Let them know this is just a ‘resource’ and they are welcome to pray about anything that they think about. They can pray about the same thing someone else prayed about, it doesn’t get ‘checked off’ the list or anything. 

Now is a good time to remind people that they don’t have to pray. They can pray silently if they want, or they can just support and echo the prayers of other people by telling God they agree with the person’s prayer request. Sometimes this is done silently, and sometimes this affirmed by just speaking out loud like ‘yes Lord’. 

Explain that there is no order of what to pray for, and who prays next. Sometimes people can feel like prayer should go around in the circle. 

Set a vision or prayer. A couple things I like to encourage people to believe and pray for are:

1. Believe BIG things – ask God for huge things. Stretch your faith and your comfort. This is on God, not on you. Believe. Pray is the single greatest place we shouldn’t hold back or budget. We should put it all out there. Encourage people to pray all in prayers. Pray that some gets healed. Pray that someone difficult comes to know the Lord. Pray that the poor would be fed, and needy to have more than they need. 

2. Remind people that where two or more gather, He is with you. 

“Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three gather in my name, there I am among them.”

Matthew 18:19-20

3. Ask that God would help you feel what is important to Him. What is on God’s heart would be put on our heart. Want what God wants. Have the desire of His heart be the desire of our hearts. 

“As a result, they do not live the rest of their earthly lives for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God.”

1 Peter 4:2

“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.”

Matthew 6:33

Someone Lead Worship Music

If someone has a guitar or other musical instrument it’s great to start with some music.  Again, I feel I’m repeating myself here but the point is to help people ease into the prayer time. We’re trying to let go of our worries and our anxieties. We’re trying to leave behind all the junk of the day and come before the Lord with our heart and our attention. We want our prayers to be sincere. Music can help us make that transition. 

Pass out the lyrics to a few songs. Depending on the small group, I might encourage you to pick songs everyone knows. Sometimes the person leading worship can pick something they feel is appropriate and timely, even though the small group may not be familiar with the song. The person delegated with music at our small group prayer time included a song that I was not familiar with but really helped get my heart and mind ready to pray. I don’t know the name of the song, but it had something to do with being a sweet smelling incense to the Lord. It helped me see prayer from a slightly different perspective and got me excited to have an offering for the Lord with my prayers. 

Just like the prayer expectations, it’s good to invite people that want to sing along to do that, but hey don’t have to. 

When we had worship some people were singing along. Some people just closed their eyes and listened, and some people hummed or sang just the chorus. It was a sweet time and everybody really appreciated the opportunity to have this music transition us into prayer time. 

Lead into the Prayer Time

Once the music stops, transition directly into the prayer time. Without music can be an awkward transition, but with the music makes it a lot easier.  As the small group leader, you should lead this. Start praying. When people hear you start to pray they will be on board and finally ready. 

Start by praying for everyone’s hearts and minds to honor the Lord. 

Next, pray for something important to you. Your prayer will set the tone for the remainder of the time to be comfortable and be yourself. When you’re done praying, for now, try to let everyone know that you’re done. Most people do this by saying, ‘Amen’.

Open Prayer Time

There endless things people can pray about, from the reference cards to the specific prayer requests, to themselves, people they know, world events, places of work. 

Let the rest of the time unravel as it will. Give people time and allowance to pray as they want and feel lead. You’ll notice some people are very formal in their prayers, and others very candid. 

Allow for Silence

Don’t end the prayer time when people stop praying. The silence is good. Don’t feel like you have to save everybody from silence by picking up the prayer when no one else is praying. Silence is a part of prayer. 

Wrap Up & Closure

When the clock is getting close to the scheduled end of your small group, listen closely to peoples prayers and consider a good time to say a prayer that thanks to the Lord for your time together. 

I’ve found people slowly transition back out of prayer time together to the conversation. It’s nice not to have a rush on it. The prayer time can really impact some people and often like the silence following this time. Give them the time and try to respect people and how they want to transition out of this time together. 

Conclusion

Prayer is an amazing tool that we are invited and commanded to use by the Lord. He wants us to bring our requests to Him, without a doubt. This idea, although talked about, can be very foreign to many people even when they’ve been attending church for a long time. 

Having a dedicated prayer time with your small group can break prayer out of the ceremonial procedure that it can sometimes be viewed as. It can change the way people experience prayer. This can be an encouraging time, and building time for the small group to grow even closer in fellowship. 

Having a dedicated time also provides an opportunity for those people who crave more prayer than the typical small group time allows. When this dedicated prayer time is not provided, the demand for more prayer can take up time from the normal scheduled small group and has the potential to eventually disturb the small group. 

There are many benefits to have a dedicated prayer time. To get started you can pick one time to do it. You don’t need to commit to a recurring time. Pick a warm and comfortable spot, some coffee, a reference sheet, and your small group and you’ve got the recipe for an incredible prayer time together. 

FAQs

What if someone doesn’t want to pray?

Ask them to still come and join the group. Let them know they don’t have to pray. Also, let them know that if they do feel prompted or moved to pray they can change their mind later on. There are no expectations on them to pray out loud. The only expectation is to show up and silently support other peoples prayers. Give them the expectation they will probably really enjoy the time and even just being there can be an act of worship. 

What if someone prays too long?

Sometimes you get someone who LOVES to pray. That’s great! But try to differentiate if they are praying too long, or you think they are praying too long. If you feel like you need to coach them with the goal of giving other people an opportunity to pray then approach them outside of the small group. Let them pray as much as they want during the first prayer time, and then talk to them offline and share with them you’re encouraged by their desire to pray. Then lead into the difficult conversation with a question like, “How do you feel about the way other small group members contributed to the prayer time?” You’re looking for any acknowledge any shortness of prayer, in comparison tot heir own. Ask them if they’d be comfortable having more silence at the next small group prayer time to see if more people contribute to the prayer time. With this, give it another go and see what happens. The goal is to give others opportunity and not restrict others. It’s to share in the opportunity of prayer. The goal is not to restrict their prayers. 

Should everyone have their heads down, hands together, and eyes closed?

No. People should pray how they feel comfortable and authentic. I remember when I first transitioned from praying with my eyes closed and hands together to going for a prayer walk. I had to open my eyes while I was walking! And in addition, it didn’t make sense to have my head down and hands together. The reason some people pray they way they do is to prevent distraction and help them focus. Focus can be both ways. Sometimes it’s from preventing or restricting outside influences. Other times it can help to have outside influences. For example, I feel some of the best prayer times is on nature walks through the forest. I feel alone and peaceful. All the burdens of the world are not with me in that place. And most of all I’m in awe and inspired by God’s creation and it causes an authentic reaction to authentic and meaningful prayer full of thanks. 

Invite people to pray the way they are comfortable, as long as it doesn’t distract others. If they want to get up walk around or stand. If they want to get a drink of water. 

What if everyone is done praying and it’s not over yet?

I recommend a three-step approach.

First, feel comfortable with silence. When you think people are done praying and there is silence, let it be quiet. If you are distracted by the silence I recommend counting slowly. Count to a high number, like counting slowly to one hundred, and repeat this two times. This will be just over three minutes. If no one has prayed for over three minutes (most likely they have), move to step two. 

Next, try initiating prayer. Jump start it again, like a  dead battery. Put your prayer cables on this thing and deliver two thousand amps to it! Put the power in your prayer. Consider praying about a new topic that hasn’t been mentioned. Look at the reference card. It’s really hard to pray for everything on the reference card in under than an hour. Once you’re jump-started the prayer, repeat step one. 

Finally, if you’ve waited a few times and you’ve attempted to jump the start the prayer, and still no one is praying then count again in silence. Pray silently and ask God to deliver any other prayers within the next minute. Count down silently in your head from one hundred. If no one has anything, go ahead and conclude early. Say a closing prayer and say Amen. There is no need to pray longer just for the sake of having a long prayer time.